In the Heat of the Moment

By Valerie Driscoll, Lead Coach and Coaching Program Developer for Apollo Health

Recently, I rediscovered the work of Hugh Byrne, Ph.D., a respected scholar, author, and mindfulness teacher. His book, The Here and Now Habit, is an efficient instruction manual on how one can use mindfulness to help with habit change, which is an interest of mine. His work is especially appealing to me as it is so simple and to the point. In our busy days, it is especially gratifying to have work presented strategically and without fuss. If you are interested in cultivating or expanding your exploration into mindfulness, this book is a great place to dig in.

Early in the book, Byrne presents the work of psychologist Daniel Kahneman and the concept that the brain “has two modes of cognitive function: an intuitive mode (which he calls System 1), in which judgments and decisions are made automatically and rapidly, and a controlled mode (which he calls System 2), which is deliberate and slower”. Byrne then briefly goes on to the work of psychologist Walter Mischel (creator of the famous “marshmallow” study on deferred gratification), who refers to these two brain systems as the hot emotional system and the cool cognitive system.

My distillation of this information is that the “hot” brain responds more emotionally and quickly, and its messages are more compelling than the “cool” brain. The hot/fun/exciting brain overcomes the cool/reasonable/boring brain, much like paper covers rock. And because the brain is super sneaky, it allows much of this to happen automatically.

So how can we spend more time in the cool brain and less time in the hot? As Hugh Byrne explains, we first have to notice that hot brain is happening.

Becoming a good noticer (or creating awareness, as we refer to it in mindfulness) is both a training and a practice. Fortunately, the average day in any life affords abundant opportunity to train ourselves to notice the heat, if we dare to look. And, as it often does, the perfect example of what I had been pondering over the course of the previous few days showed up, as if it had been sent from the timeliness faeries:

As I have done the last few Novembers, I am dog-sitting in New Orleans. Not only is NOLA my favorite city, but it is also home to my favorite shoe store. EVER. While I have mostly curtailed my need for shoes (and I fully realize the shallowness of this statement), these aren’t just shoes; they are art and fashion and an investment (not really, but it sounds good).

I had budgeted for a pair of shoes as my birthday/Christmas present to myself, so I happily walked into the French Quarter to carefully select my gift.

Two hours later, with a dozen shoe boxes stacked around me, intoxicated by the power of 0% APR, I was considering also treating myself to New Year’s, Valentine’s Day, and possibly some kid’s upcoming Bar Mitzvah I had read about on Instagram. My emotional brain was burning at 1000 degrees centigrade, so hot that I was in a flop-sweat and spewing out toxins like a Swede in a sauna.

I hate when this happens until I love when this happens, because I suddenly became aware of  WHAT was happening, and I knew that I had to cool down. You, reader, would only be able to understand the significance of this moment were you able to see both my retirement accounts and my shoe closet.

But amid all that giddy heat, my mind-in-training kicked in and noticed not only the temperature and the components driving it, but also how I could start to cool down. With less heat, I realized I didn’t need all the shoes, just the pair for which I had saved. Much to the dismay of the salivating salesperson, I walked out with my birthday gift heels and a pair of socks on sale. It. Was. So. Cool.

While my moment this week was shoe-related, the holiday season is upon us, and it is always a hot one. Here at Apollo, we are creating a program that will include a module on habit change to help you train your brain and build skills to go from hot to cool. I have been involved with its development and am so excited to see it come to fruition in the near future.

In the meantime, my invitation to you is to begin noticing when your “hot/emotional brain” is showing up around a habit or behavior. If you are able, also practice observing the situation with as much objectivity as you can. In my case, I saw my reflection in the giant store mirror and asked myself, “Who do you think you are, Carrie Bradshaw, I remembered that the character had once described herself as the old woman “who would be actually living in her shoes”.  I just started to laugh and went over to look at the socks.